Saturday, October 8, 2011

3's Company and 4's a Bore

3's Company and 4's a Bore

Single, couple, pop; there's a bun in the oven about to drop.

The night's of the single, glamour girl are now behind you. You've swayed, swatted, and swooned. You've kissed a prince, he made you cry, you brushed off your shoulder and said good-bye. 

Fast-forward. Through several tubes of gloss, and countless puckering, you've found the one. Yes, the one! 

Sharing is caring, marriage is bliss, the bed of two is now; 

Conversing with parents sparked a huge question: When is the correct time to make children sleep in their own beds? I've heard stories from parent's expressing dismay over the sleeping arrangements. One parent is OK with the family bed while the other thinks its an absolute chore. I've heard complaints extending from: the impact on their comfort, sleep, as well as intimacy. I couldn't imagine, except in extreme circumstances, allowing such variable to create such a negative influence on my life.

One parent stated, "I'll just sleep on the couch if it gets too bad".
When asked about intimacy, she said, " We just have sex with them there; they sleep hard".


Readers, excuse me if I'm missing something. I am no mom, no step-mom, no 1/2 of a couple for that matter, but "getting busy" with "my child(ren)" in the bed seems absolutely repugnant.

However, the respondent is not alone. I researched a few articles in which parents admitted to having "quiet sex" while their children laid in slumber.

So that leaves me to ask, When should children sleep in their own beds? Also, should parents have sex while their children are in the bed?

I really want to hear your voice.


Oh my, that's amazing that some folks would do that while their child is sleeping next to them. My son just turned ten and he falls asleep in my bed from time to time. I don't mind though!

thats disgusting. atleast have the courtesy to leave them sleeping in your bed and take the party to their on second thought thats gross too :-/

My hubs tried that one time saying the kids won't know but I could not do it.My kids did sleep in the bed with us from 3 months up I had to get my rest and that's the only way they slept through the night. At 2 we usually move them in their own bed then at 3 to their own room. Every child and every parent is different. We had our times together in other rooms so we would not wake the kids up.

wow, i guess people just get jiggy with it when hormones strike!! LOL while i'm all for intimacy and keeping the excitement alive - sex while your children are asleep NEXT to you does not sound intimate or excitement to me. are you serious?! god forbid they wake up, WTF am i supposed to say?! as my mother always said, "there's a time and place for everything." amen.

i think children should begin sleeping on their own bed once they hit toddlerhood and keep working on it until they're 3 (this is coming from someone who has worked with many children and families) . it seems like this has been a crucial stage for parents, learning to let go, acknowledging that their children - even at that young age - are capable human beings. prolonging them to sleep with you on your bed (which is different from falling asleep on your bed on occasion) seem to do more harm than good.

That is opinion. I couldn't do that. I mean whether the kids sleep hard or not...what if they're play sleeping? Lol like for real?

I think if I were a parent, & depending on how old my child is, I wouldn't mind them sleeping in the bed from time to time. But when its bedtime, they will be in their bed so there's no accidentally falling asleep in our bed...probably easier said than done...I know.

This picture is hilarious~! That was my bed this morning. My 4 and 2 year old goes to sleep in their bed, but end up in the bed with us in the morning(most mornings). I think your child should sleep in their own bed at day 1(bassinet or crib). My husband was big on the shared bed, but I refused sex, so he made sure that we were intimate during the day or early in the day while they were playing. I think its gross that couples said they were having sex in bed with their kiddies.

my kid is 17 and she rarely ever slept with me because i prefer to wake refreshed not bruised from somebody swinging their arms around all night!!

and the sex with kids in the bed....#really? it aint that serious

I am with you Dr. Reginia, and yes, I agree there is a time and place for everything. I don't think it's a good idea for parent's to let their child sleep in their bed, it's a hard habit to break.

Our son has slept in his own bed from day one. We moved him to his room at about 2 months. On nights when he couldn't sleep or wasn't feeling well, one of us (me) would go into his room and stay until he fell asleep. If necessary one of us (me) would take him into the guest room until he fell asleep, this stopped at age 2.
Now at four, if he isn't feeling well, we will stay with him in his room until he is relaxed enough to sleep. I tell you all this because we didn't want to get into the sleeping in our bed deal. I support those who do it, it just wasn't for us.
Regarding the sex....I commend those that can get into that zone and block out the kids, I'm just not one of them.

OMG that's a case of emotional abuse if I ever heard of one..seriously quiet sex while the kids are laying in the same bed...soooo sooo wrong! Kids should be in their beds from the get-go...I'm not a parent either but have the kids sleep in their own beds! People need to watch Supernanny for bedtime routines!!! Couples need and should have their couple time WITHOUT their kids in the bed.

Thank you all for your comments. The family bed situation wouldn't work for me. I would definitely start my children in their own beds( crib, toddler bed, big girl/boy bed) from day 1. Like another poster stated, if they are scared, sick, or whatever, I or my husband would go to their room. I wouldn't ever have sex with kids in the bed.

My daughter is 10 and just this year has she been able to sleep in her own bed. She is an only child. It is hard to justify why she has to sleep alone while mommy and daddy have each other to give protection from the night monsters. lol She has never slept with us through the entire night. We let her lay with us until she falls asleep and then we tell her to get up and go get in her own bed. She always gets up and goes. Now she can't go to sleep unless we are up. If we all go at the same time she almost NEVER falls asleep. Having sex with her in the bed is insane! I could not even imagine. I guess these people are talking about young small children. smh Kiah

ew! no! Thats just, well. How could you possibly concentrate? Seriously? If my kid was still sleeping in my bed (thank goodness he's not) we'd just have to find more creative spots, but absolutely not NEXT to the baby?! gross.

Wahaaaat? Sex whilst your child(ren) are in the same bed as you must be wrong. Very wrong. Oh wow!

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